Im writting a short essay and i need someone to revise it for me
for run-ons comma slices and fragments please
also i need some ideas for a conclusion could you give ideas
this is my topic
In spite of the distractions that Wine mentions in his essay, people still go to the movies. Why? In a short paper of approximately 500 words, explain why people still pay to see movies in theaters instead of – for example – staying home and watching television or playing movies through their VCR’s or DVD players. One possible reason for going out to the movies is to get out of the house for a change. Think of others to add to your paper’s analysis
this is my essay…….
Although going to the movies these days often means we have to tolerate the long lines, high prices for tickets and the occasional rudeness of people, many still flock to the theatres for many reasons. Many movie enthusiasts exist and most go for the newest exciting movie premiering that week while just as many enjoy the social concept of being out with friends as well as the nice large screens and quality sound.
One reason that people go to movie theatres, is that they provide newly released titles before the movie rental stores. Movie theatres allow people to socialize, get out of the house, and enjoy a new movie that, otherwise, would not be able to seen for months until it is released on DVD or blue ray. While some would rather wait for the DVD release, it is possible, with all of the public hype, that vital parts of the movie could be spoiled, and ruin their experience. Meaning they wont have the same experience because they know some parts of the movies. Therefore, viewing a film before in theatres has many benefits.
Another reason may be that people enjoy the social concept of being out with a large amount of friends. Therefore, they find it more interesting and convenient to go to a roomy theater. For example a friend might want to invite a large group a friends to their house, but the problem might be it will be to crowded and noisy in the house. In the other a hand the movie theater provides lots a room and is more enjoyable to socialize with friends. Also she or might have date its most proper to go to a movie theater rather then having a date at their home.
Lastly, the large screen really attracts people to the movie theater. The screen provides a better and fascinating picture then a regular home t.v. Put it like this if action movie that has really good effects is coming out in theaters he or she is going to want to watch in the massive screen because the experience will be more realistic Also the sound is really important when it comes to watching a movie it provides awesome sound. People truly enjoy the movie when it looks realistic. It gives them there money worth.
CeeCeePink says
"Meaning they wont have the same experience because they know some parts of the movies." (sentence fragment)
"Another reason…" you may want to add "to go to a theater" (or something like that) or put a comma between friends and therefore.
Add a comma after "For Example"
"In the other hand" should be "On the other hand"
"Also she or might have date its most proper to go to a movie theater rather then having a date at their home." could be phrased " Also, a person might have a date which would be more comfortable to go to a movie theater rather than having a date at their home."
Lastly, the large screen really attracts people to the movie theater. The screen provides a better and fascinating picture then a regular home t.v. Put it like this, if an action movie that has really good effects is coming out in theaters he or she is going to want to watch it on the massive screen because the experience will be more realistic. Also, the sound is really important when it comes to watching a movie. It provides awesome sound. People truly enjoy the movie when it looks realistic. It gives them their moneys worth. (I just added puncuation to this whole paragraph)
*The conclusion could be about all the yummy treats you can get at a theater!